By N Lothungbeni Humtsoe
“Each one of us is constantly battling with opposing thought processes. Where one ends, the other begins. And let’s not blame it on the internet.
“Social Media is not the reason for the existence of Fomo or lack of Jolo. It is simply our addiction to it. Our need to belong. Our need to be loved. Our need for acceptance,” says Rashi Gaur, global consultant and life coach.
“Imagine this scenario where you have had a crazy week and all you want is the week to end so that you can relax with your favourite television series, sipping on some hot beverage, comfortably tucked in, in your soft comforter.
“And the moment arrives. And at that moment, for whatever reason, you decide to check your phone. And there it is. A video recently posted which is brimming with excitement, fun galore, dancing, music, and all your friends.
“And then this feeling of being left out grips you. And at that very moment, you have stopped enjoying the present moment. The fear of losing out, of not belonging, of not being a part of that network disturbs your mental framework and the end result is anxiety.
“Enough research has proven that anxiety and stress are amongst the biggest reasons for causing multiple ailments. And this is perhaps one of the biggest drawbacks of Fomo.”
While you are looking forward to a rested weekend, you make a conscious decision to switch off your phone, disconnect from what’s happening in the world and focus on yourself.
You snuggle up on your couch, read a book or watch your favourite show and let yourself slip into a deep calm slumber.
That rested recuperated feeling that you will wake up with, that extra energy, that you would perhaps use for your morning workout, which could lead to a recharged mind and body can be a game changer for you.
Rashi says: “It’s time to ask yourself which phase are you in at this juncture of your life. In this world of gizmos and gadgets that we are a part of, to become a person with no Fomo is close to impossible.
“And unless you are a sage, a saint, it’s never going to be a Jolo situation in your life 100% of the time. However, balance is the key. Define your purpose in life. Ask yourself what is important to you. At any given point of time when Fomo grips you, remind yourself of that purpose.
“If missing out on something is helping you take a step towards your purpose, then that missing out is a good thing. And the moment that acceptance comes, you start to feel the joy of letting go.”
“Fomo, fear of missing out can be a good thing. Especially when it pushes you to be more success-oriented, when it pushes you to work harder to have a more luxurious life, when it pushes you to run that extra mile for better health, when it takes you to the gym or when it encourages you to take a break from work and travel with your family or friends (because others are doing it too.)
“Jolo, joy of letting go, is a beautiful practice. You learn to embrace it when you start to overcome your fears of missing out. When you have the courage of letting go of a toxic relationship without the fear of the unknown, you find yourself breathing free.
“When you have the courage of letting go of a job that you have disliked from the core of your being, you find a new direction. When you have the courage to let go of your children, they create their own wonderful world.” Rashi said.
So, ask yourself today, which phase are you in? Most importantly, ask yourself, are you happy?