Motherhood's hidden battle: Breaking the silence on postpartum depression

In the realm of motherhood, moments of joy and connection often intertwine with deep-seated struggles that go unnoticed.

For many mothers experiencing postpartum depression, the haunting thought, “This baby would be better off without me,” looms silently in the shadows.

These poignant words poignantly coalesce the deep anguish experienced by mothers, as highlighted by Kim Vermaak, an author, book coach, and paternal mental health advocate dedicated to raising awareness around maternal mental health challenges.

As September dawns upon us, marking Suicide Prevention Month, Vermaak underscores the significance of addressing the silent suffering of mothers and the grave need for support.

“In South Africa alone, suicide is a leading cause of maternal death, accounting for approximately 1% of maternal fatalities between 2014 and 2016,” she emphasizes, referencing data compiled by the National Committee for Confidential Enquiries into Maternal Deaths in 2018.

She further reveals that suicide, in a global context, is the foremost cause of direct maternal death between six weeks and twelve months postpartum, attributing to a staggering 39% of such deaths, as indicated by the Maternal Mental Health Alliance.

"These statistics are not just numbers; they represent mothers, daughters, sisters, and friends," Vermaak notes solemnly. Her own journey reflects the grim reality many face, having battled postpartum depression after the birth of each of her three children.

“I know all too well the overwhelming feelings of isolation and despair that can accompany motherhood. I often found myself consumed by intrusive thoughts, questioning my worth and abilities as a mother,” she admits.

Yet, it was an unwavering faith, counselling, lifestyle changes, and the pivotal step of seeking help that illuminated her path toward recovery.

Despite the prevalence of postpartum depression, many parents wear a mask of happiness, concealing the internal battles they fight daily.

“Too often, parents suffer in silence, fearing judgment or feeling uncertain about where to turn for help," Vermaak expresses, advocating for a collective effort to break the stigma surrounding maternal mental health.

“It’s time to initiate a transparent conversation about these afflictions.”

Determined to uplift others, Vermaak is steadfast in her commitment to enhancing awareness and furnishing essential resources for individuals grappling with maternal mental health challenges.

Through her platform, she shares personal experiences and collaborates with mental health professionals to offer guidance and spark hope.

In the wake of her passionate advocacy, Vermaak encourages those in pain to remember, “You are not alone. Help is available, and recovery is indeed possible.”

Anyone with thoughts of suicide can call Sadag 0800 567 567 or SMS 31393.

Graphic by Hannah Gilbert

IOL