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Once you lose the trust of someone, you have also lost them as an ally, and it's unlikely they will be there for you when you need them.
If they have reasons to doubt what you say, they definitely won't go out on a limb for you or watch your back. In short, having a reputation as less than trustworthy can have some significant negative consequences.
At work, a boss who doesn't trust you makes it almost impossible to grow in your position.
You won't be handed good opportunities or projects. In relationships, a lack of trust can lead to problems including fights and simply a gradual deterioration of the original connection.
Its impacts can be felt everywhere from poor communication with your partner to problems with your sex life. There are many reasons why you should make it a top priority to assure that you are viewed as trustworthy.
According to the FBI, there are some things you can quickly do to gain people's trust. At the same time, however, there are mistakes and behaviours that may seem harmless to you that can have the opposite effect and cause damage that's almost impossible to repair.
No matter how confident you seem as you make your way through life, you won't get ahead if others don't trust you. Even if they listen to you, they won't take you seriously. And they won't turn to you when they need help or advice, or even reach out when they are making weekend plans.
Lying from time to time isn't necessarily a problem; the occasional white lie is common and it's part of human nature as we try not to cause offense or stir up trouble.
However, there is a big difference between lying in order to avoid hurting others and lying for personal gain.
Then there is the issue of coming up with excuses to not take responsibility for your own actions and words. Behaving in such a way shows other people that you are not really trustworthy and that they can never know for sure if what you are saying is true.
Many of us have been tempted, at least once in a while, to cancel on a friend so we can instead spend the weekend binge-watching our favourite series.
And sometimes it is necessary for our physical or emotional health to opt for some alone time. As with lies, it's a question of how often it happens and what motivates it.
You can't depend on a person who always cancels on you, especially at the last minute, since there’s no way of knowing whether they will actually follow through on what they promised or whether they will, once again, change plans on you without warning or explanation.
An important element in gaining the trust of others is to be consistent, as well as present. On the other hand, if the most consistent thing about you is that you actually never do what you have promised you would, then you’ve created a huge obstacle to trust.
Many of us feel the urge to gossip, some more than others. There can be a certain excitement to it, but nothing destroys trust faster than passing on information that was told to you in a clearly personal and confidential manner with the understanding that you would keep it secret.
As a rule, if your friends, partner, or family tell you something in confidence, honour their privacy. Unless you have permission, never share it with those outside that person's circle of trust or someone who was not part of the original conversation.
Has anyone ever handed you their phone so you could look at a picture and you then decided to start scrolling and see what else was there?
Have you ever looked at someone’s incoming messages when they left their phone unlocked or unattended? Then not only did you betray their trust, but you also violated their basic right to privacy.
No one is going to trust you if they know they can't leave things in your care because you lack self-control or respect for others.
There is scientific research that indicates people who complain constantly and engage in excessive and unconstructive criticism are seen as less attractive.
Without a doubt, it can make people distrust you. They realize that if you regularly talk about others negatively, there is nothing stopping you from talking the same way about them when they are not around.
It’s said that if you don't have anything nice to say, it's better not to say anything at all. The ways in which you talk about others when they are not present reveal a lot about you as a person.
[ Via GQ India]
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