Beware of girls with that sweet smile

Sandile Dikeni

It is not a national boom. It is a bit touchy. A bit scary too. In Africa we (South Africa) have had the most pregnancies (this year or last year), I heard on the radio.

Let me put it this way; our girls, not women, mind, had tremendously high figures for pregnancy. The percentage of conceiving was so high, a national talk radio station took it to air. It was not just one of those “talk radios”.

Well, I used to work for it. Knowing me, I presume you know it is not a light-hearted talk radio station that I am referring to now.

The presenter sounded concerned. So were the panellists. More so were the listeners who called in. Mind, the callers were not just any lightweight mugus. No, they were heavyweight.

Among them were doctors, for instance. Some of them sounding like some persona in law. The shocking speculation was that the pregnancies were not an entirely male persuasion, hayi, it was a motive in the minds of the many ladies, sorry, I mean girls, who got pregnant.

In my mind, the initial thinking was that the tendency was probably part of the sexist reality of South Africa. But further listening did make me think that the so-called pregnant girls were deliberate in intention.

Girls, we heard, were looking at conception as a way out of economic deprivation. In other words, a girl tired of poverty will automatically smile at an ou in the taxi or in the church or at the Waterfront just to get him doing that thing!

It was also mentioned that the guys involved were not youngsters. They were adults with financial prospects. The girls were getting involved with them to secure themselves financially.

Imagine, then, my sceptical eyes when I see an old-timer with a young lady. Let me be quick to say my naiveté does not want to generalise and see age difference as an anomaly.

But seeing a young lady with an old-timer does, in the corner of the brain, raise questions about them. It is also popular talk that narrates that some girls have a programme of action that targets victims not only via age, but on educational quality.

So, if you are known to have a post-high school qualification, regard yourself a potential target for the feminist financial attack.

The attack, they say, can happen anywhere; shebeen, church, sports field, conference hall or (they say, mostly) at the bank. I don’t know, this is only what I hear.

It is also said that they don’t really look at your race or ethnicity to declare you a victim.

The real dangerous moment, they say, is when she comes to you with that sweet smile that says you are the best thing in the world because you are the reason why she is pregnant.

She also quickly suggests ways in which your prospective kid can be rescued from the terrible South African economy.

The saying is that this has been happening for a long time, but has recently seen an improvement in that the girls have become technologically capable of sharing information.

They send each other information by internet and advanced technology that the guys in the township are not interested in. It is also rumoured that the postgraduate township man is target number one because he cannot see how a girl of 17 or 18 without a degree can swindle him in any fashion.

Personally, I think that finances play a role, but there is also the biological that I see. I have no proof of this, but there is, in my thinking, a thought that the feminine sector of society is more interested in babies than the male. Let me ask, though: Is this pregnancy trend positive or negative? The question is not a biological muse. It is also a financial question.

Further, probably also naive too, are we not subjectively saying to Africa and the world, “take note, here we are and we are ready to be seen in numbers”? The problem here is that it is difficult to hear a South African saying this.

Take note of my modesty when it comes to South African women. It might be an African patriarchal view, but it is difficult for me to hear a young South African girl saying this.

Difficult, yes, but not impossible. To be honest, I miss the days when one could, without attending a press conference, develop a comprehension on issues like these.

Being in a patriarchal society, it is also difficult to ask the tribal society what is the male sexual understanding of this. It would be fascinating to hear what the sangoma is saying. Maybe the issue is not related or limited to the sociology department anymore, but rather a matter for the tribe to resolve.

In African etymology, it is sometimes, say my township chaps, easier to get an answer from izinyanya(ancestors) on issues like these.

The statistics are saying that KwaZulu-Natal and the Eastern Cape are the highest in this girl pregnancy debacle. A question to ask would be: Are the Xhosa and Zulu aware? (I have not heard their commentary on the issue). If they are aware, do we need to worry? I am bit anxious and I heard many callers on radio expressing that anxiety.

I listened to the social scientists on radio and asked myself whether we are not supposed to ask our sangomas because maybe they might be able to tell us something (I also tried to tune in into the ethnic stations, but no one was addressing this issue).

Their word is not the last, but maybe it is important to hear them too. This is not me pushing an agenda revolving around the importance of our ancient anthropologies, but rather a mind that says we should explore them all to make sense. Okay, more than intellectual, let’s call it “guttural”.

Birth in African societies is regarded as one of the most important aspects of life. So do I, for obvious reasons. Because I know if my mom had decided to abort me, I would be angry. Very angry. How else would I have written the many beautiful things I have written had I not been born? But so would you who have read my works.

So, you see how dubious I am on the intricacies of this current issue? I do not know where to go on girls and women’s current pregnancies. I really and honestly do not. In my mind, no, in my heart, there is something that begs for a deeper understanding – excuse the pun. In a strange way, there is a thinking in me that it is not tragic.

On the other hand, let me be honest, the argument on social explosion does make sense.

The big question is: where should we go? There is a deep feeling that begs society to resolve the issue. Maybe if we solve the issue, the Springboks will win against teams like Japan.